Monday

The Solution To High Gas Prices



The solution to high U.S. gas prices and the dependence on foreign oil is simple. We Americans need to use less energy, less gasoline. We Americans need to drive more efficient cars which get better gas mileage and use less fuel. This is beneficial to your wallet and to the environment.

The solution to high U.S. gas prices is … golf carts.

How it works
Congress simply outlaws all gas guzzling SUV’s and all other passenger vehicles which do not get at least 50 miles to the gallon. Congress then mandates the gasoline or electric powered golf cart as the only legal private passenger vehicle in the U.S., with the exception of motorcycles and motorbikes. Detroit auto makers can begin making golf carts, in the price range of $7,000-$12,000, instead of SUV’s in the price range of $50,000-$75,000. Foreign luxury auto makers can do the same, in the price range of $15,000-$25,000. What rich guy or gal wouldn’t want to drive a Mercedes or BMW golf cart, with leather interior and a 12-speaker Bose audio system, and get 50-60 miles to the gallon? And, for soccer moms larger double-length or triple-length golf carts would replace SUV‘s and mini-vans.

Benefits
The national speed limit would be reduced to 20 mph. Traffic deaths would plummet. Drunk drivers, instead of killing people, would bounce harmlessly off whatever they run into. Teenage drivers would not be a vehicular accident danger to others or themselves. Little old ladies in Florida could drive as slow as 15 mph and not trigger road rage. At a top speed of 20 mph reading, eating, putting on makeup and sex while driving would be safer. And cell phone use and texting while driving would no longer be a hazard. Everyone would slow down and have less stress. And save lots of money on gas.


The golf cart is the solution to America’s high gas prices and dependence on foreign oil. The golf cart solution is also a good way to appease the thousands of energy environmentalist liberal extremist nutcases in the U.S. … and shut them up once and for all. The millions of NASCAR fans, however, will hate it.


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