Israel To Buy Iraq

(Washington) - In an effort to get rid of the ongoing problems in Iraq the White House today announced it has agreed to sell Iraq to Israel, for the sum of one million shekels ($240,000).

Monica Lewinsky, of Bill Clinton's administration and now the new White House Press Secretary, issued the statement, "Iraq has been a never ending political and financial nightmare. Thank goodness it's now Israel's problem."

In Tel Aviv, a spokesperson for the Israeli government stated, "We're going to resell Iraq for 100 million shekels ($24 million) to the Palestinian refugees so that they can all leave Israel and go live there. Maybe they'll be happy there and maybe then they'll stop whining about not having their own homeland. Plus, we'll make a nice profit."

Representatives of the Iraq government could not be reached for comment as they were all busy packing their bags and heading to Abu Dhabi.

Historically, Iraq is an ancient area, thought by many to be the cradle of civilization, and is believed to be the land which is now Israel. According to the Old Testament, the land was originally given to the Jews (aka the Chosen People) by God Himself.

Oy vay, such a world.

The above headline and story is not true. It was made up, by the author, solely as comedy, with no intent to harm or offend. Any of it which turns out to be true, in whole or in part, is purely coincidental ... and would be even funnier.

copyright Andrew Lawrence. All rights reserved. May not be reproduced, in whole or in part, without written permission.