Las Vegas Tops Heaven

As Ultimate Destination

(Las Vegas) - A new report by the Las Vegas Visitors Board shows that more people go to Las Vegas than go to Heaven.

More than 40 million people a year go to Las Vegas. Far fewer go to Heaven.

Las Vegas is a very popular destination for people in the U.S. and other countries. "There's a lot to do in Vegas," say Simon and Sandy Sinner, a married couple from Burbank, California. "It has everything a Sinner could want. Plus, Las Vegas is very exciting. Heaven sounds kinda boring".

A spokesperson for the Las Vegas Don't Ask/Don't Tell Associaton states, "Vegas has gambling, slot machines, fabulous shows, showgirls, sporting events, shopping, buffets galore, garish hotel rooms, lots of neon and nightlife, and lots of strippers and hookers. Las Vegas means fun! You can do anything you want here and no one will know; what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas."

It's the ultimate playground for adults. Maybe that's why Las Vegas is the world's #1 destination.

Heaven, on the other hand, offers only eternal bliss.

The above headline and story is not true. It was made up, by the author, solely as comedy, with no intent to harm or offend. Any of it which turns out to be true, in whole or in part, is purely coincidental ... and would be even funnier.

copyright Andrew Lawrence. All rights reserved. May not be reproduced, in whole or in part, without written permission.